Of Loss and Gain
by Hart-of-Tree-Hill
Summary: Set after 5x21 and during 5x22. Emma reflects on the love she just got back, and the loss that others are now forced to endure. Spoiler/Speculation for 5x22. Based on new sneak peek. Captain Swan oneshot.
**A/N:** **Just a short one shot based on the new sneak peek for the episode. Told from Emma's perspective about what she's thinking when Hook bursts into the diner and how she's feeling now that he's back. Spoilery/speculation. Enjoy!**

Regina's loss hits her hard. Really, truly it does.

If anyone else in this town knows about loss it's her.

She did after all just storm the Underworld with nothing but _faith_ and _hope_ that she could both find and save her pirate. And for a few moments she lost that hope only having it be restored once the sound of a soothing, lilting voice hit her ears as she mourned yet another casualty of this never ending battle.

Truthfully she'd know that voice anywhere, it had become her salvation, the piece of stability she needed when all else was lost. Which is why she needed to turn around and see the man who was to be her future for herself, for she feared her mind may be conjuring these voices to provide some sense of that stability that she had been lacking ever since losing her true love.

Her fortune isn't lost on her when she turns around and is proven to not be hallucinating as her salvation is once again right in front of her and is soon in her arms as she assaults his face with kisses.

She's not so caught up in her happiness that she forgets to fill Killian in on the truly tragic and major loss. He likewise is not dense and selfish, so they stand there for several moments in the rain holding each other tightly, both for fear of losing the other and out of gratefulness, as they together mourn the loss of an amazing man, friend, partner, and father. They hold each other because they know that others have lost the ability to do this, hold the person who will always have your back, so they do it out of gratefulness.

As they walk hand in hand to Granny's Emma doesn't for one moment forget why they are walking there. It isn't for the usual town gathering or celebration of defeating another villain, no it's for the celebration and mourning of an amazing life. Along with this she doesn't forget who exactly is waiting there, in the same emotional state that just an hour ago she was in.

She wants more than anything to walk into Granny's, her pirate firmly glued to her side, and announce his return. But doing so could only further upset Regina.

When Killian died she at least had hope that she could rescue him from the Underworld, and when she learned that she needed to leave him behind she had closure. Regina received neither of these things.

For these reasons, also due to the shock that would accompany seeing someone who was presumed dead, she reluctantly let's go of his hand, placing a tender kiss on his lips while her hand lingers over his now beating heart and gently tells him to wait there for a few moments.

He reluctantly agrees, as he seems to understand her reasoning and doesn't dare fight her on it. Not that he wants to even a little bit.

She knows that this conversation with Regina needs to be had in private. Regina is still Regina and she has never coped well with loss. She knows that she can handle the anger and sharp words that will accompany this. She just doesn't want an audience for it, especially not Killian who would readily come to her defense and undoubtedly make the situation worse.

The second she sees the look in Regina's eyes she knows she was right.

That look is a look that she knows all too well since she's been wearing since that fateful night with Excalibur. Well she's been wearing it until very recently. It's a look of emptiness, tiredness, and just plain anger.

It's whatever stupid new crisis that's taking shape that keeps her from doing so as some light shoots into the sky shaking the entire diner. Not even five minutes of peace.

And of course her over protective pirate comes rushing in ready to lay down his life _again_ for her if need be, making his presence well known.

She'd be lying if she said that this didn't make her insanely happy. It means that after all of this one thing hasn't changed and that's him. And it means everything.

She can feel Regina's searing glare as everyone takes his presence in and it makes her uncomfortable because she _just_ got him back. But she does nothing because she has her world back and Regina's just got ripped out from underneath her.

She's absolutely certain that her and Regina will come to blows eventually once she makes one comment too many about her boyfriend being undeserving of being back. Because he does deserve to be back.

He saved the whole town while he was in an entirely different world and got literally no benefit from it.

But she won't fight her on it right now, not while Regina adjusts her entire life to fit without Robin. No definitely not now.

She's also certain that she will be coming to blows with many other town members who can't get past who Killian used to be and will harass him mercilessly. But for now she stands there in a panic.

Then he says it 'well now I'm back' and she can't help the smile that comes to her face.

Because yes he is back, and he's not going anywhere if she has anything to say about it. Everyone else be damned.

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